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Saturday, 11 May 2013

Crowd surfing without the crowd and other political election rally stuff ups.

Imran Khan is a Pakistan hero and I was really scared for the cricketing legend as he plummeted to the earth after falling from an alleged stable forklift. Someone's going to be in trouble for that campaign stuff-up. The whole episode, though slightly embarrassing yet oh so painful, can be viewed via Youtube here: (I certainly am sick of the footage so don't feel obliged to view it.)

I so do wish Julia Gillard or Tony Abbott would take a leaf out of Imran's book and try to crowd-surf without the crowd. We all know what Abbott would be wearing. The whole episode made me wonder why politicians do these election fiascos when all they really need to do is keep quiet and allow their Opposition to fail. I also wonder why Gillard announced an election 7 months in advance. Kissing babies, shaking hands, being a rotten-egg-throwers' target practice, intense media grillings, relentless travel, lies, promise back-flips and forever sucking-up to random people is the life of our pollies during election campaigns. I'm not tempted at all to join the public service.

American presidents should moonlight as comedians during their elections. Especially George Bush who has more comedic material than Chaplin, Allen and Hope combined.

If what a pollie wants is votes then he/she should do the right thing and simply buy them. Forget the campaign trail and just pay voters a nice sized retainer for their vote. Taxpayers can pay because taxpayers pay for everything pollies do. Or, we can go back to the forklift model and learn some valuable campaign lessons.
-Never trust Pakistan forklift hire companies.
-Never descend from a forklift until it has grounded its' forks.
-Never retire from international cricket and then use a forklift as a dais,
-Never let your bodyguard ride your forklift and then pull you down to the ground by the neck when it randomly fails.

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